Working for You

During my Masters I had to take on a supermarket nightshift job for financial reasons. Fair enough, except that at the time of writing this post, I'm still there over three years down the line. That was where the title of this poem came from: questioning what my efforts were ultimately going towards. Happiness with a future companion? Time will tell.

The verse itself has a fairly straightforward premise: trying to move on with life while wrestling with memories. And meanwhile, settling gradually further and further into the place you've ended up in – for comfort's sake, probably. Seeking solace in drinks with friends, and music...perhaps that last bit is the reason for the unusually large number of songs I drew inspiration from here! Including one from Men At Work's Cargo album, deserving of special mention as the soundtrack to my Masters year.

The top photo here is of 'the orient of Oldfield', a fanciful reference to the easternmost point of Bath's Oldfield ward. (I've always been into the intricacies of administrative geography, but they don't often crop up in my poems.)

WORKING FOR YOU

Twisting my heel on the orient of Oldfield

To mark a new week

And the frost and the fog don't matter

I have bigger steps to take.

I'm here in the city
Where the songs all speak my name
Fears dispelled in melody
An easy drug to fake.

Heading home is all the outcome
I can find in days of doubt
Dependable roads can lead me there
Longing for a new or old path.

I can't begin what will not start
And so I try a promised potion
Mix it up in modern measures
The drink is dry and does not last.

Names and names and faces
Dance and spin in bubbles
To catch one I'd be happy
Except there's one I know.

It floats within me now and still
My heart defends itself
If it gets into my bloodstream
Then the hurt will surely show.

Forceful, endless longing
Exhaustion and regret
These are the wages of waiting
And loving yesterday.

But I will keep on working
Working for you
Whenever you are
Whoever you are

Still to come, or flown away.

Thanks to: Roger Taylor for I Cry For You (Love, Hope And Confusion), Dire Straits for Southbound Again, America for Only Game In Town, David Bowie for As The World Falls Down, Men At Work for No Sign Of Yesterday, and The Killers for Shot At The Night.